At the time I'm writing this, I've already being home for at least a week.
This one week is nothing but pure bliss to me. I didn't think taking holidays is all that important until this time. Well, yeah of course you'll be "home" everyday, you may argue.
But what I'm trying to say is this.
Just imagine that ...
1. I don't have to wake up at 8 am in the morning, get dressed, and drives groggily to work.
2. I don't have to worry about tasks that needs to be completed.
3. I don't fret about unfinished tasks or projects.
4. I don't have to face the music for tasks not done properly (or think of excuses to save my a**).
5. I don't have to have close encounters with the great"taichi master" that I may loathe or meet people that are a fickle and hypocrites.
6. I don't have to feel frustrated for a good job done with lack of recognition.
7. I don't have to feel depressed when bad news or announcement looms or became a reality.
8. I don't have to read emails and respond to them.
9. I don't have to worry about lunch time and what to eat.
10. And finally, I don't have to spend my 12 hours on it.
All the points aforementioned pretty sums up to the dreaded four-letter-word of W-O-R-K.
And by the tone of the writing, you'll notice that it is very discouraging and filled with negativity.
Let's take a step back and trace how all this happened...
You seee...For the past 6 months, I have not have any proper rest as I have been slogging and slogging like no tomorrow at work trying to get my tasks done. And I may have thought that I'm a superwoman of some kind, and I'm doing this without any break. Zero. No break at all until ....well the Chinese New Year, but guess what? I' was STILL WORKING and supporting my counterpart on Chinese New Year as well. So that doesn't count as a proper holiday as well.
And being so overwhelmed with work plus all the stress, frustration and sometimes tense situation has got the better of me and so I've turned into a grouchy tiger waiting to pounce and chomp someone's head off at any moment. I was a live ticking time bomb about to explode.This definitely triggers the chain of event that follows:
Needless to say, I need to mention that I'm easily irritated by things or scenario that changes all the time. No firm answer, that's it. I hate it!
I wonder why is it so hard for someone to make a decision and be firm about it.
A "confirmation" is liken to a "maybe". And someone's "yes" is actually a "no" and vice versa.
Just imagine this (I know its not the greatest example..but...who cares).
Scenario:
You felt the urge to pee. And you walk to the toilet and there in front of you lies the urinal.
1. Do you actually think before you pee? Should you pee or not?
2. Do you change your mind then decided not to pee?
Come on, for most people , the answer would be NO and you'll just pee.,right?..but for some strange reasons, there are people that turned back and walk away. But why???
Why can't you just stick with the damn decision??
Also, why do some people will not admit any mistakes despite being starkly WRONG?
Does uttering the word "SORRY" takes so much effort?
And and, can you just do whatever you like, selfishly without thinking of how other's might feel?
Like changing a certain stuff/processes to suit you needs and then causing grief to the so rightful owner of the stuff/processes you've changed? Gosh..please have some common sense. The least you can do is just ASK.
All these peculiar events could not have happened at a better time. And that's how they drove me up the wall. So on a very fine day, all hell broke lose and that's when I showed my stripes (a.ka harimau menunjukkan belang). Crouching tiger have at long last appear from her hidings in the bush, ready to unleash her mighty power. I wasn't happy to be frank and that's when I snapped and cursed and throw hurtful remarks. Nothing could stop me.
When that happened, this is it...I know it's time that I needed a break. A long break. A long hiatus.AWAY from WORK....that's it.
So here I am now, writing this blog on my favourite spot on my comfy couch sipping my favourite milk tea.
As the saying goes "Every cloud has a silver lining" and this has never been so true to me.
I felt that I have lost control of my life and now it's time for redemption. Not that I've done anything wrong, but with the time that I have now, I'll redefine my goals and this time ensure that my work life should revolve around me, and not the other way round! I need to set my priorities right, and work will never be the first priority again.
Quoting what Suze Orman always preach, "People first, then money, then things".
I'll live by this rule now.
Don't worry, once I'm fully recharged, I'm back not with a vengeance, but the same ol' tamed ellwye (imagine puss-in boots in Shrek.. lol ;)) taking charge of her life and beyond!
Have a good day. :)
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